never stop what you cannot control

i took a break from writing

lost my girlfriend
got a dui the same night

at the station before
putting me in the drunk tank
they asked if i wanted to injure myself
in any way

i said of course
but that’s never stopped me
from doing what has to be done
before now so its of no matter

they didn’t think it was of no matter
and gave me a cell to myself
and kept their eye on me
every hour or so for a few seconds

i reached in my watch pocket to find
they had forgotten to look in there

i keep razor blades loose in my pockets for safety
my fingers are bloody from jamming my hands in
not caring

i sat there thinking how stupid it was of them to not
find a fucking razorblade in a jailed man’s pocket
but i kept my mouth shut and bled until
my girlfriend bailed me out

she told me that’s the last favor i’d get
which was a lie since we fucked as soon as we got home

__________________

Advertisement